Written by jerome yaovi onipede. Posted in Get Captivated


Dear Jerome good day. Please I will like to know if this is normal. My husband is always coming up with crazy ideas like making love to me on the beach, wanting other people to see my naked body, or making love to me through my anus. I have agreed for him to do it through the anus once. I want to know if it is normal, or he’s just a pervert. Please reply very fast, and use this as a topic one of these days.

Thanks a lot for your mail to me. I will like you to know that your mail got me thinking because, before it came, a lot female have been asking me lately why men can’t date a woman without wanting sex these days. I have been told by these ladies that refusal on their part also means end of a relationship that never started. It hurts these ladies so much because relationships mean so much to them at this stage of their lives, and they really look forward to it, but don’t want to be told that sex has become a yardstick for starting a relationship. What bothers me now is despite the fact that most of us men want more sex these days than before, I wonder how many of us are ready to give good sex. A lot women complain to me that most men are not good on bed and those ladies have to pretend that they enjoy the sex, even make noise like it’s beautiful when in actual fact it’s disgusting for them. It’s so amazing that in a world where people old and young seem to be engrossed in sexual acts or fantasy, a lot still don’t know how to pleasure their mates on bed, but rather come up with all sorts of sexual designs that does not bring pleasure, but turn the bedroom to another theatre for gladiators and not lovers. I can say authoritatively that this unfortunate situation has largely been influenced by Pornography, which is browsed, watched and eaten by more men these days. No wonder sex seems no longer to be about bringing pleasure to our mates, but using our mates for our own animalistic gratification. Could these also be happening because the Bible says that in the last days difficult times will come, and that one of the problems men will face will be “their lack of self-control”? As a man, will I want to sleep around with every woman that comes my way, not because I’m in love in love with her, but because I can’t control myself?

While we ponder on the Text message above, kindly run this test below to see how well you are doing in your sexual life, and if you answer YES to more than 3 of the questions, you may need to work on your sexual life before it destroys you. I use this test for my Seminars tagged “Sexual Concerns”.



1. Do you frequently fantasize or think about sex?


2. Have you made promises to yourself or others to change or stop some of your sexual behavior, and then broken these promises?


3. Does your sexual desire cause you to associate with people you wouldn’t normally be with or do things you wouldn’t usually do?


4. Has frequenting sex sites on the internet for sexual stimulation become a habit for you?


5. Do you frequently engage in sexual chat in sexually oriented chat rooms on the internet?


6. Is masturbation a frequent activity for you?


7. Do you have or have you had an extensive collection of pornography or other X-rated material?


8. Have you gotten rid of a pornography collection and then started collecting it again?


9. Do you with some regularity rent (or buy or make your own) X-rated videos?


10. Do you like to “channel cruise” on TV to find sexually stimulating scenes, or do you subscribe to cable in order to view sexually explicit programs? Or do you stare at scrambled (blocked) sex channels for the occasional fragments of clear images of sexual material?


11. Are you attracted to phone sex?


12. Do you frequent topless clubs? (Please note that it exist in Nigeria )


13. Do you frequent modeling studios for sex? (Please note that it exist in Nigeria )


14. Do you go to massage businesses where you are able to obtain sexual massages? (Please note that this is going on In Nigeria)


15. Do you frequent adult bookstores for sexual excitement or sexual activity?


16. Do you frequent, or have you frequented X-rated movie theatres?


17. Do you frequent other sexually-oriented businesses?


18. Does your Spouse or regular sex partner frequently complain about the amount of sex or the type of sex you desire with him or her? If you really think about it, could your demands of your partner be excessive or outside normal limits? Or, do you suspect that your regular sex partner submits to your requests that may be excessive but doesn’t tell you?


19. Have you violated your marriage or other relationship by having sex or affairs with others?


20. Are you especially excited by sexual behavior that includes a risk of being caught?


21. Do you get a sexual thrill from exposing your private body parts to unsuspecting onlookers?


22. Do you have a habit of trying to get forbidden looks at people that give you sexual excitement?


23. Is anonymous sex with others a frequent indulgence you seek, or one you periodically return to?


24. Do you take advantage of opportunities to touch people sexually that you find attractive by touching them in a way that makes it seem accidental?


25. Are you an adult who engages in sexual activity with children?


26. Are you an adult who forces other adults to have sex with you against their will?


27. Have you been, or could you be arrested because of some of your sexual behavior?


28. Does some of your sexual activity cause you to have a secret life hidden from significant others?


29. Does your sexual behavior or fantasy sometimes make you feel hopeless or depressed?


30. Have you been told by someone that your sexual behavior is excessive, inappropriate, or out of control?

So what do you think? Do you know that an unhealthy sexual life can and has destroyed many marriages and relationships? You can avoid it, if you seek help on time as this applies to both ladies and gentlemen.

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